Hello, Blog

Well, hello, blog!

What happened?

I got mad at Harley for not writing here, and in my usual way, just gave up on the whole thing. If he wasn't going to do it, why should I? Can you say codependent, boys and girls? I knew you could!

So what am I doing back there again after 6 months? Well, I got back up to 285... go figure. And we kept trying to get pregnant. And finally, it stuck. I found out about a month ago. I'm due April 8, 2009.

And of course I was thrilled. And renewed my vow to get healthier while I was pregnant. But that's hard to do when you're packing up an entire house for a second move in a year's time. Yeah, we needed a bigger house and a room for the baby, but did I need more stress? That would be a big fat NO, thankyouverymuch...

So about 2 weeks ago, just for chucks and giggles, I checked my blood sugar. Harley's diabetic and has all the testing equipment (not that he ever, ever tests... he doesn't... it just sits there... so I thought, well, someone should use it!) Poked my finger, checked out the results...

183. After eating Taco Bell and having one of those yummy new Fruitista drinks.

EEK! So the next day, I vowed to be "good."

Fasting: 103

1 hour after breakfast (oatmeal made with milk): 130

1 hour after lunch (tuna fish sandwich and a glass of milk): 132

2 hours after dinner (tuna on toast, glass of milk): 114

Hmm. 103 is a high fasting. It should be under 95 (especially for pregnant women.) The other numbers weren't tooooo bad - should be under 140 one hour after you eat and under 120 two hours after you eat.

The next day's numbers were interesting, too:

Fasting: 120 (ouch!)

1 hour after breakfast (oatmeal made with water - we were out of milk): 150 !!!

But look at this:

1 hour after lunch (4 oz. steak): 94

Well then... looks like it's the carbs. Even "good" ones like oatmeal, that aren't tempered with protein. It's official - I'm pre-diabetic.

The question now is... is it enough? Is it enough to get me to stop slowly killing myself with food? Is the thought of a child with congenital anomalies enough to make me stop? Is heroin food more important to me than that... than anything?

Because after I discovered my sugars were elevated, I started doing the research, and it's not good. Women with pre-diabetes and undiagnosed diabetes have a risk of having babies with birth defects - specifically heart and neural tube abnormalities.

So now I'm opting for all the genetic testing - the neural translucency scan, the quad screen, the whole she-bang. Because I didn't catch this, really, until I was about 6 weeks along - and by that time, the heart was already formed and beating. And I know if my sugar was 183 after Taco Bell - imagine what it was after a piece of cake with no protein to balance it?

In the past two weeks, I've gone from 285 to 272. But that's rather irrelevant, considering. I've been checking my sugars, and for the most part, they've been fine, except for my fasting number, which is always borderline-highish. But I've cut out sugar entirely. No more junk food, no more fast food, no more regular soda. No more carbs in the form of white bread, rice, pasta, potatoes.

Two weeks. Only ... 223 days to go. :x

I honestly don't know if I can make it...